


no longer a little problem

by cherrychoke



Series: baby gay jongin series [2]
Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Asexual Character, Bisexual Character, Blushing, Coming Out, Crushes, Flirting, Fluff, M/M, Shopping, Too Much Blushing, baby gay jongin, too many feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-14
Updated: 2020-04-14
Packaged: 2021-03-01 19:29:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,112
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23652361
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cherrychoke/pseuds/cherrychoke
Summary: (sequel totiny little problem)jongin's problem isn't little anymore, not to mention very frustrating.
Relationships: Kim Jongin | Kai/Park Chanyeol
Series: baby gay jongin series [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1707043
Comments: 20
Kudos: 61





	no longer a little problem

The next time Jongin visits their house, he’s alone. He clutches on the straps of his small bag for his dear life, waiting anxiously in front of the door. He’s not even sure Chanyeol is free — or even in the house. He plays basketball in his free time, so maybe he is busy playing with his friends right now, and he’s about to be severely embarrassed in front of whomever is going to open the door.

Sooyoung opens the door, her face going from static to a cute smile when she realizes it’s him. She’s wearing shorts and a loose t-shirt, she opens the door entirely, leans against the door with her arms crossed. “What brings you here?”

Jongin licks his dry lips, eyes searching for a familiar tall figure to come to his rescue.

“He’s inside,” Sooyoung laughs, covering her mouth with her hand. She presses herself against the door, gestures him to come inside. “You’re a cute one.”

“I’m older than you,” Jongin mutters. Sooyoung laughs more when she hears it. Jongin’s ears and his entire chest is burning from embarrassment. It feels like everyone around him knows why he’s here, what was running around his mind the moment he stepped out of his house.

Sooyoung walks him to Chanyeol’s room, knocks for him. Jongin gives her a weird look. She shrugs. “Courtesy. You’re a guest.”

“What is it, Sooyoung?” Chanyeol seems to be annoyed by the disturbance. Jongin feels bad instantly, it seems like he’s disturbing, but it doesn’t last soon. Sooyoung bangs her fist onto the door, looking annoyed. Jongin pretends he didn’t jump because of the noise.

“You have a guest! Let him in, you idiot.”

The door opens quickly. He pulls Jongin in with one hand, which flusters him so much he starts pacing back and forth, his bag discarded near the study table. Chanyeol is wearing a loose black t-shirt with cream coloured shorts. He puts his chin on the door, pouts at Sooyoung. “When will you respect me like a brother?”

Sooyoung gives him a mean, sarcastic smile. “When you start liking one.”

Chanyeol flicks her shoulder playfully, shuts the door into her face. She looked like she was ready to physically fight her brother. He sits on the bed again, looks at Jongin with an amused smile. Jongin feels his heart pound against his chest. The room seems too small for both of them, it definitely needs more air.

“Hi,” Chanyeol beams at him. He picks up his phone, holds it in his hands while waiting. The phone looks small in his hands. “You didn’t text me about coming here.”

Jongin gulps the nervous lump in his throat. “Y-you didn’t give me your number last time.”

Chanyeol frowns. There’s a moment where Jongin feels sheer panic. Maybe he read everything wrong, maybe Chanyeol doesn’t like his company — maybe he didn’t really enjoy talking about video games and playing some last time. Maybe he said ‘let’s do this again’ out of courtesy and not because he actually wanted to.

Suddenly, Jongin wants to leave. He wants to leave and hug Yerim and cry about how he’s an idiot to read into things. Just because Chanyeol’s sister is gay and he’s educated on being LGBT+ and the struggles which follows, doesn’t mean  _ he _ is gay. Or is interested in dudes in any way. Jongin can’t believe his gay (or bisexual? In his case?) realization is because of a straight dude. He took a whole week and half on getting educated on the topics.

He realized he’s bisexual halfway through it, learned that the guys he was ‘jealous’ of — he secretly also wanted them to kiss him, let him hold them and their lovely bodies. He’s also journalling now, because it’s helping him with coming to terms with this new discovery. Yerim helps a lot, too. They’ve gotten ridiculously close in just a week and a half.

“Jongin?”

Jongin snaps out of his spiral, looks at Chanyeol with wide eyes. “Uh, yeah?”

“I asked you if you’re okay,” Chanyeol pats the space next to him. He even holds his hand out. “Come here, are you okay? You look like you’re about to cry.”

Jongin sits next to him hesitantly, doesn’t let Chanyeol hold his hand. He’s already regretting his hopeless crush, and holding hands with his crush doesn’t help him get rid of it. He places his hands on his lap, tries not to look at the bulge-like resemblance of the bunched up boxers, which is very much in his eyesight. He has an unfortunate thought which stirs something warm in the pit of his stomach. He squirms, fidgets with his fingers.

“Give me your number,” Chanyeol gives him his phone, open with the new contact page. “I thought I took your number! I’m sorry.”

Jongin is met with a devastating pout, making him giggle involuntarily. Chanyeol is so cute, it makes his stomach feel like it’ll erupt into butterflies. He takes the phone, saves his number and has a small debate to add a small heart next to his name or not. He doesn’t, in the end. They aren’t close enough for him to do such things, he tells himself. He really did want to add the heart though. It seems to be a very… subtle way in movies and dramas to flirt with a character.

He looks back at Chanyeol’s face. He didn’t realize their faces were so close until now. Chanyeol is staring at him, his eyes are so pretty, it makes all of him extra pretty. Jongin gulps, his body feels frozen, he can’t move even a bit. He fights the urge to lean forward and kiss Chanyeol’s glossy lips, or even touch his lips with his thumb.

He snaps out of it, averts his eyes at Chanyeol’s table which is cleaner than before. He clears his throat, notices how the elder doesn’t move away even after he’s looked away. He can see a small smile on Chanyeol’s face in the corner of his eyes. “I did some research, about LGBT+ community.”

“Oh really?” Chanyeol moves back, leans his hands on the bed. “And?”

Jongin isn’t sure what to say about it. They discussed it briefly last time, moved onto video games because he had more knowledge about those than the community — he didn’t want to make a fool of himself. Now, though, he isn’t sure what to say. He shrugs. His words are barely a whisper. “I think I’m bi? I’m pretty sure I’m bi.”

The words come out of him easily, only because he knows Chanyeol is at least a good ally. But he can feel his fingers become cold, his breath shortening just a little. He’s read so many coming out stories, but actually doing it to a person is actually pretty scary. It wasn’t much, with Yerim, but he was scared for sure. Despite knowing Yerim herself is part of the community. He can’t yet fathom the fact that he may have to come out to strangers, which is already 100 times worse because he has to talk to strangers in the first place.

A hand rests on his back, makes him tense up a little. Chanyeol strokes his back once. “That’s nice. Congratulations?”

Jongin guffaws, throwing his head back, clapping his hands. “Why would you say congratulations when someone comes out to you!”

“I don’t know!” Chanyeol chuckles with him. “That’s what Sooyoung wanted me to tell her!”

“It’s pretty nice,” Jongin nods, then slumps himself onto the bed. “Unexpected, but not unwelcome.”

Chanyeol lays next to him with a hum. Jongin wonders if he can turn onto his side, lay on Chanyeol and gently kiss his lips. Or just lay on Chanyeol’s chest and stare at his pretty eyes and pretty face, while Chanyeol wraps his arms around Jongin’s waist. Or if they both will turn the same time, stare at each other for a while, lean in a kiss — entirely forget who leaned in first. These thoughts have been more… active, since he figured out he likes guys too. It’s a little easier to imagine with guys, for some reason, but equally scary. Watching gay movies in his free time is proving to be the best and worst decision he’s ever made.

“Here, lift your head, Jonginie.”

Jongin lifts his head, watches Chanyeol adjust his arm for it to be a pillow for him. Jongin came all the way till here to know if Chanyeol likes guys or not. And if he does, can he go out on a date with Jongin. He didn’t want any of this. His heart feels warm as he rests his head on Chanyeol’s arm. It’s nice, comfortable just like a pillow. He snuggles closer to Chanyeol. He keeps his arms to himself, though, no matter how comfortable Chanyeol’s waist might seem. 

“Thank you, hyung.”

How in the world is he functioning like a normal human being, Jongin doesn’t know. But he’s glad. Because his ears are so hot, his mind is thinking of all the possible ways they could make out just in the room, then the softness of Chanyeol’s hair, and his heart is twisting with want. He’d love nothing more than doing everything his mind is suggesting, and yet, he doesn’t know even a little about Chanyeol. Other than the fact that he enjoys videos games a lot and that his little sister is gay.

“I don’t know much about you,” Jongin says, voice soft. He looks up, his cheek ends up being pressed against Chanyeol’s chest. “Other than the video games part.”

Chanyeol looks at him, chuckles, then leans in and presses a soft kiss on Jongin’s forehead. “You’re a cutie, Jonginie.”

Jongin wants to scream. He manages a weak smile, looks away from Chanyeol to control all of his urges to squeak like a little girl and run away. He wants to bury himself into the ground or eat his own fist. Something which isn’t staring at the wall with wide eyes and thinking about asking for more kisses. 

“What do you wanna know?” Chanyeol brings his arm around Jongin’s head, staring at the ceiling, starts playing with the strands of Jongin’s hair which sticks out.

Jongin is barely breathing. He takes a deep breath, tries his best to collect himself. “Uh, do you like someone? Are you dating someone?”

Chanyeol’s movements stop. He glances at Jongin with a knowing smirk. “Asking the important questions, I see.”

“I-it’s not important,” Jongin squirms a little. “It was from top of my head, okay? You don’t have to answer… if it makes you uncomfortable.”

“Why would it make me uncomfortable, silly?” He pats Jongin’s cheek with his finger. He gives Jongin a big smile, then goes back to staring at the ceiling. “I’m not dating anyone. I liked someone a couple of days ago? It’s gone now, though.”

Jongin’s stomach sinks. He tries his best to ignore the feeling. “A… girl?”

“Why do you sound so unsure?”

Jongin grumbles. “I don’t know your sexuality, I’m just assuming here.”

There’s a long silence. Jongin isn’t sure if he messed up something. He purses his lips, tries to think if he should apologize for overstepping any boundary he didn’t know. Now, he wonders how all those girls mustered up the courage to ask him out, when he can’t even bring himself to ask his crush about his sexuality. Sure, asking about sexuality is more… private, not a stranger’s business, but it’s starting to seem like getting to know if Chanyeol likes guys or not is harder than asking him out.

As much as he wants to say ‘hyung, do you like guys or not?’ in Chanyeol’s face, Jongin’s brain melts away the moment he makes eye contact with the elder, he doesn’t know how he’s going to get any information out of him.

“It was a boy,” Chanyeol sighs, chuckles to himself. “Straight, unfortunately. Although my friend was sure he could turn that guy gay in two days.”

Jongin just wants a pillow and two minutes to scream his heart out. Even one minute is fine. He can’t handle all these feelings with a straight face. He’s sure the huge grin on his face looks stupid, but he can’t shake his happiness out. That was hard enough, maybe asking him out will be easier now.

“You’re bi too?” Jongin’s voice is so obviously excited. He gets embarrassed a second later, curls into himself with a shy smile on his face.

“I’m ace, but I feel romantic attraction.”

The word sounds familiar, but he can’t remember what it means. He licks his lips. “Ace as in…?”

“Asexual?” Chanyeol chuckles. “I thought you did your research, Jonginie.”

“I did!” Jongin pouts, looks up at Chanyeol to make sure he feels bad about his comment. “I just couldn’t remember it for a second.”

“Oh God,” Chanyeol laughs more, brings Jongin’s head near him with his arm, and presses another kiss on his forehead. “You’re so cute, I can’t handle this.”

_ What does it mean? _ Jongin wants to scream. What does it mean that Chanyeol is calling him cute, kissing his forehead, making it clear that he feels romantic attraction towards boys as well? And holding him like this?

“Have  _ you  _ ever had a crush on someone, Jonginie?” Chanyeol’s tone is playful. “Or have you dated anyone?”

“I have,” Jongin’s pout finally turns into a smile. “A couple of girls. It didn’t last that long, though. We were really childish back then.”

Chanyeol scoffs. “You’re saying ‘back then’ like you aren’t only 19 years old.”

“You’re only 20! Why are you saying that as if you’re 30?”

“Because,” Chanyeol uses his free hand to cup Jongin’s cheek. “You’re adorable, trying to sound like an old person.”

Jongin wants his suffering to end. Does Chanyeol look at him like a cute younger brother or something more? How does anyone ask such questions? ‘Hey, do you mean I’m adorable like I sound like your little cousin or like you’d make out with me on the bed?’ Yeah, doesn’t sound like it should be said out loud.

“How many people have you come out to?” Chanyeol asks.

“Uh, you and Yerim. That’s about it. Does it count if you send an anonymous message to a blog about your confusion?”

“I don’t think so,” Chanyeol shrugs. “But, tell me about your confusion~”

Jongin thinks it’s best if he pretends that it’s someone else. He groans as he starts. “He’s so affectionate, physically affectionate — towards everyone, I think. But he’s so affectionate, and I feel these things when I’m around him? He makes me feel like I’m going to burst if he doesn’t do these things I have in my head.”

Chanyeol chuckles. “That sounds cute. Are any of those things… body-related?”

“Body-related?” Jongin understands the second he repeats the words. His face becomes warm, he squeaks, hits Chanyeol’s chest while whining. “Hyung!”

“What!” Chanyeol laughs, seeming very pleased with himself. “I was just asking! You know, like kissing and stuff! What did you think?”

“You didn’t mean that!” Jongin hits him over and over again, trying to get rid of his embarrassing thoughts. “You definitely didn’t mean ‘kissing and stuff’! Liar!”

“Maybe I didn’t~” Chanyeol is having so much fun from all of this, it’s only making everything more embarrassing than it already is. Jongin wants to hide in a dark corner till all of this laughing and teasing is over. “But you thought about it anyway, didn’t you~ That’s why you’re cute, Jonginie~”

There’s a knock on the door which saves him from further teasing. Chanyeol is still giggling when he says ‘come in’.

Sooyoung peeks her head through the door, doesn’t bat an eye at the way they’re laying next to each other. “Mom wants you to go grocery shopping.”

“Are you sure she didn’t ask you first?” Chanyeol’s expression is hot. Jongin is glad the elder’s attention is not on him. 

“No, she said ‘tell your oppa’ so I’m doing just that,” Sooyoung snickers. “It’s your bad day, I guess. I want a dark chocolate bar.”

Chanyeol groans. “I’m not getting you anything, my pockets are empty.”

“Please!” Sooyoung pouts a little, then slams the door close before Chanyeol can protest again.

***

“Do you like these?”

Chanyeol points at matcha flavoured kitkats. Jongin nods. “They’re amazing.”

Chanyeol tosses four of them into his basket. “Let’s get you those, then.”

“I thought your pockets are empty.” Jongin giggles thinking about their sibling banter.

“They are, for her,” Chanyeol chuckles. “I always buy her something. I need to save some for this new video game coming out.”

Jongin’s laughter dies soon when Chanyeol turns his back, goes back to searching for something, and he can’t help but think what those words mean. He frowns, grabs the chocolates and puts them back into their places. Chanyeol notices him doing it, looks at him with a similar frown. 

“Why did you do that? I thought you liked those?”

Jongin hesitates. He looks at their shoes and the tiles. He’s definitely going to sound like a child, but he needs to draw a line. He doesn’t mind being treated like a friend, not like a sibling. “I, uh, I don’t want it if you see it like you’re buying it—”

Jongin cringes, collects his words better. “I don’t want you to buy those for me, like I’m your younger brother or something.”

They aren’t the smoothest of words, but at least it puts his thoughts into a coherent sentence, right?

“What? No, no,” Chanyeol reaches out and holds Jongin’s hand. He squeezes them. “I’m not— Do you— Did it seem like I’m treating you like a younger brother?”

Jongin tenses immediately. The problem is, he doesn’t know how brothers’ relationships work, he’s the youngest of their family, but he has sisters… and it’s definitely how sisters would treat their younger brothers. Buying them things, talking about things for hours together. Maybe not play video games.

He shrugs instead of replying.

“Wow,” Chanyeol huffs, then laughs a little. “I’m sorry if it, rubbed you that way. I don’t consider you as a younger brother. That’d— it’d be the opposite of everything.”

Jongin doesn’t want to ask what ‘opposite of everything’ means, but he definitely wants to know. He finally looks at Chanyeol, who is smiling, clearly amused. He gently punches Chanyeol’s arm with his free hand, his face warm for the nth time today. “Don’t laugh, I just. I wanted to make that clear.”

“Oh I know, Jonginie,” Chanyeol lets Jongin's hand go, taps Jongin’s chin with a cute smile. “I knew the moment you came to hangout with me.”

**Author's Note:**

> this is an unedited/unbeta'd mess. im sorry for any mistakes.
> 
> (sobs) i suffered because of this one. i couldn't stop writing it. i couldn't stop myself until it felt like it's finally a place to end and i can't believe nini finally fucking said it i thought i'd never sleep tonight because of this. i agonized over this so fucking much. it's my first time writing 3k in a single sitting i want to die orz (there might be another part of this au. i hate myself and this au so much.) please let me know if you liked it!!! <3
> 
> (my [twitter](https://twitter.come/royalkjmyeon) (if you wanna read all the suffer-tweeting i did) | [curiouscat](https://curiouscat.me/cherrykims))


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